After I breastfeed Kenley for almost a year, I told myself (and my husband) that if it was that hard again, I wouldn't breastfeed another child. Kenley's latch was perfect, I made plenty of milk, and I pretty much had zero problems. Except...when she would nurse, should would nurse for an HOUR on average. Aaahhh! Which meant that if we went anywhere, I couldn't just whip it in and out and be on our way. It. Was. Exhausting. So I never nursed in public. There was just no time.
Then Eleanor came along. Again, perfect latch, enough milk, zero problems. Except this kid had allergies, ALL the allergies. She was allergic to all of the 6 main allergens (milk, eggs, fish, nuts, wheat, soy) and then some. And because I was breastfeeding, I too was "allergic" to these things and to go on the craziest (an most expensive) diet. It. Was. Hard. Although I won't lie, it was a super fast way to lose the baby weight. All of which I have since gained back.
After breastfeeding for a year, I decided I would stop so I could eat all the things! I But...she grew out of those allergies (thank goodness!) so I decided I would breastfeed and still eat all the things, 'cause weaning is the worst. So I plowed on, every month saying it was the last. But honestly, I was too tired and lazy to even try. She never took a bottle or pacifier so my boobs served as that for her. It was the ONLY way to get her to sleep. And boy do I need sleep.
Shortly after she turned two, I decided I wanted my boobs back! I'm sick of wearing nursing bras, and nursing tanks, and scheduling everything around my boobs. It took about 3 months but...I HAVE MY BOOBS BACK!
It's pretty exciting. It was hard and emotional and the last thing that physically connected me to my last (likely) kid. I cried, A LOT. Partly because I was losing that bond, partly because my boobs hurt (cabbage people!), partly because you are so extra hormonal when weaning, and partly because I was so damn tired trying to get her to sleep without boobs. Rock, swing, snuggle, repeat for 2+ hours twice a day.
We are still figuring out how to get her to sleep but my boobs, they are officially all mine. And if I want to wear a turtleneck in this super cold Los Angeles weather without having to worry about how to get my boobs out, I can! Welcome back Mandy's boobs! I missed ya!
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| one of the final days of me breastfeeding. |
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| asleep on mommy, with no boobs! |
